September 15, 2003
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The other day, I sat and watched the HBO special on 9/11/01. I had to--for instance I'd never allowed myself to watch footage of those unfortunate souls that threw themselves off the towers, tumbling obscenely to their ends--I was afraid I'd forgotten how horrific it was, especially footage right after the collapses with the downtown covered in ash, no sound but the shriek of locators; firemen and policemen bent over, stunned as all the trappings of modernity precipitated softly about them. And seeing the benign, dolphinoid form of a passenger liner disappearing in a tower is still barely believable. You could almost imagine something like that scene in the original Matrix when Keanu Reeves rescues Trinity out of the helicopter and induces a glitch in the computer program that doesn't quite accept the improbability of this act, allowing glass to ripple like water; the problem is that 9/11 happened, and there was no real glitch.

I'm currently on a Thoracic surgery rotation, having been switched in from Neurosurgery for logistical reasons. So far it's been a pretty good rotation except yesterday where I cross-covered all the Cardiothoracic services for one complete Earth's rotation. I was outnumbered, and never even made the attempt to apply my head to a pillow. I've slept 4 hours now and still am very tired.

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